Today is "Let's Make Fun of Stupid Lyrics Day." The song, "Roller Coaster," sung by Luke Bryan. It's possible he didn't write the song, so I won't make it personal, but every time I'm driving in my car and I hear this song, I think "What a stupid song. Did this person even think about what they were writing?
The regular verses to the song aren't bad. It's the chorus I object to. Observe:
When we spent that week wide open
Upside down beside the ocean
I should've known where it was goin'
Still tryin' to keep my heart on the tracks
And I should've known that kind of feelin'
Would last longer than that week did
Blown away and barely breathin'
When Sunday came and it was over
Now she's got me twisted,
Yeah, I'm still twisted
Like that old beach roller coaster
Let's take this train wreck line by line.
1. We spent the week wide open. What does that mean? What does that look like? I always imagine something like this:
2. Upside down beside the ocean. Really? I mean, really? And I'm not saying that sarcastically. Even if this is figurative, what do they mean, upside down?
3. I should've known where this was goin'. Okay, not bad.
4. Still tryin' to keep my heart on the tracks. Yeah. Sounds like a fabulous situatuti0n to me.
5. The rest of the chorus. Also not bad. But I just never listen to it, because HEART on the TRACKS?! Come on!
I can't listen to this song. It makes no sense, not even figuratively. I just want to shake whoever wrote it and say "Write something that makes sense, darn you." This goes back to my old mantra about saying what you mean. If they were really anything like "upside down beside the ocean" I might not have such a huge problem with this song.
But they're not, so I do.